Domestic Problems: The Life of Organization XIII
by enviousdragon098
Summary: Whoo!Two stories posted in one day.I'm on a roll!This is a collection of oneshots that show the crazyness and stupidity of the Organization.Rated T for language, and other things.
1. Prologue

**Disclaimer: I don't own the characters in this story. Man,I gotta find some way to make these cooler.**

Prologue

The life of Organization XIII is not easy. It is filled with countless domestic problems. One such problem is sharing. For example, Demyx never shares his sitar with _anyone, _and everyone is over-possesive of their weapons. Another major problem, is that everyone hates Xaldin's cooking. Most of the members all are tired of Xemnas' constant droning at meetings.Inside this story, you will learn about the many ups and downs of living in The Castle That Never Was.


	2. Annoyance and Boredom

Chapter 1: Annoyance and Boredom

" Hello, my fellow Nobodies!!" Axel announced, flinging the living room door was an awkward silence. Axel frowned as he looked around, only the 'older' members were present. He assumed the others were in their rooms.

"Axel do you mind?Were watching a soap opera on TV," Vexen said. Axel grimaced, and left the room, stat. He sauntered down the white hallways of the castle.

"Man,I wish there was something to do in this damn trash heap," he said to himself."I know, I'll bug Roxas!" Axel made headway for Roxas' door,a black and white door with 'XIII' engraved on took it upon himself to make an entrance, flinging Roxas' door open as he did in the living room, and announcing, "Yo, Roxas-buddy!"

Roxas was on his bed, previously reading manga, but now staring at Axel like he was crazy."What are you doing?" Roxas demanded, folding down the manga page he was on and tromping over to his door. "Who said you can bust open my door?"

"Cut me some slack, I was bored," Axel responded shook his head.

"Fine, do you want to do?"

"I dunno. Hey,wanna play some DDR?"

"Sure, you bet!"

* * *

Meanwhile...in the dwelling of the Melodious Nocturne, all was bored. Demyx was sitting on his bed, humming to himself. Then,suddenly, something weird, but oh, so common happened.

"TWINKLE, TWINKLE, LITTLE STAR,HOW I WONDER WHAT YOU ARE!"

Demyx continued to screech 'Twinkle,Twinkle' at the top of his lungs, complete with weird is, until Zexion pounded on the singing Nobody's door.

"COME IN!" Demyx sang.

"DEMYX, YOU BUMBLING IDIOT! I CAN'T FOCUS ON MY BOOK! SO SHUT THE HELL UP!" Zexion hollered at the top of his lungs,something that no one ever thought was paralyzed, and he started to play his sitar, at the risk of being yelled at by the small-sized schemer.

* * *

As Zexion finished yelling, he walked back to his room to continue reading, but he couldn't concentrate, because Demyx was being such an idiot. He found himself walking past the game room, where Axel and Roxas were having an all-out DDR war. Hey, that rhymed! Zexion decided that it was best not to ask.

Zexion encountered Marluxia on his way to the looked pale-faced.

"What's wrong with you?"

"I learned something horrible today on the internet," Marluxia answered, voice quivering a little.

"And that would be..."

Marluxia swallowed hard and answered,"Mother cats lick their babies' butts to open their buttholes."

"Ew!" was Zexion response,but he was not suprised that Marluxia was so horrified. He loved cats.

* * *

Okay, I'm gonna end it here. I'm tired. Hope you enjoyed it!

Please be nice in your reviews.


	3. Disney World:Part 1

Chapter 2: Disney World, part 1

Today was a quiet morning. That is, until Xemnas announced on the intercom, "All members report to the throne room!"

Everyone scrambled there, to avoid getting yelled at by Xemnas once the meeting started. At the meeting room, once all was there, Axel decided to make a smart comment.

"Well, Superior, what boring thing do you have to say to us today, hm?" Several heads turned to his direction, including Xemnas, who scowled.

"Number VIII, for your information, this announcement is not boring. I think that even some of you, delinquents might like it," Xemnas answered, still scowling. Some of the so-called delinquents leaned forward, which included, Axel, Demyx, Roxas,and Marluxia. They were anxious to hear what Xemnas had to say.

"Yesterday, I gave the thought of taking a vacation. Then, since most of you have been working hard in your previous missions, I've decided to let you all come on a vacation with me. We're going to Disney World."

All around the Superior, screams of joy erupted. Those who were most happy, were Axel, Roxas, and Demyx, who were bouncing up and down in their seats so hard that they were making the whole room shake.

"Calm down!" ordered the Superior, recieving no response.

"CALM DOWN!THE SUPERIOR HAS TO SAY SOMETHING!!" Saix bellowed. Instantly, everyone stopped, and turned their attention to Xemnas.

"Thank you, Saix. Alright, so are there any questions?"

"How will we get there?" Luxord asked.

"We can use the RV in the garage."

"Where'll we be staying, dudes?" Xigbar asked.

"Where else? Disney World Resort! I made reservations there last night," Xemnas stated. "Anything else?"

Demyx started bouncing up and down in his seat screaming, "Ooh!Ooh!"

"Yes, Number IX?" Xemnas answered, rolling his eyes slightly.

Demyx stopped bouncing, and asked, "Where will we go first?"

"Hm, Magic Kingdom, I suppose," Xemnas said. "Are there any more questions? We leave in two hours. Pack up. Get it? Got it? Good. Dismissed."

2 hours later...

Xemnas, Saix, Xigbar, Xaldin,and Vexen are waiting in the RV for the others. Meanwhile, Axel is taking a nap, when he wakes up, horrified that he had started to pack two hours ago,then fell asleep.

"Dammit! I can't believe I fell asleep in the middle of packing my stuff!" he cursed, scrambling to his suitcase, and throwing clothes, underwear, his toothbrush and toothpaste, and various other personal items, including his camera, iPod, laptop, and matches in there. Then, Axel sprinted at full speed to the garage. He arrived out of breath, and proceeded to drop his belongings into the back of the RV.

Roxas was in the hallway, accompanied by Demyx, and they were both on their way to the RV. Ahead of them was Zexion, and behind them, just leaving his room was Marluxia.

"Hurry up, Marly, or you'll be left behind!" Demyx chirped playfully.

Marluxia growled under his breath.

Eventually, everyone had made it to the RV in time for departure. Xemnasgot in the drivers seat and drove the bus onto the highway, with Axel, Demyx and Roxas chanting, " Road trip! Road trip!"

Luxord played poker with Xaldin and Lexaeus, and Luxord was winning. Xigbar polished his surfboard, hoping that they'll be going to Typhoon Lagoon. Vexen read some geeky textbook filled with words impossible to comprehend.

Fifteen minutes later, everyone was bored out of their minds. Axel gazed out of the window.

"Hey, dorkwith the red hair!" someone said. Axel jerked up, and looked around for the fool brave enough or stupid enough to call him a dork. In front of him was a bus filled with college-age students, all taunting the Organization.

"You guys headed for the dork convention?!" the guy taunted.

Axel's temper was one not to mess with. Roxas approached him. "Hey, Axel, why are you fuming?"

"Those shitty bastards in that bus called me a dork, twice!" Axel growled.

Roxas looked to where Axel was gesturing at, and saw the college kids.

The same guy who taunted Axel said, "Yo, dumb blonde! Your red haired buddy needs some cookies to calm him down! I bet all your friends are babies just like him!"

"You assholes shut it!" Axel and Roxas screamed in unison.

Axel turned around and gestured toward the guy, and his clothes caught on fire.

Roxas observed as several people doused him with water to put out the fire."You retards don't realize that we can make your bus implode!" Roxas yelled.

15 more minutes later...

Xemnas sat at his seat, driving the bus and humming to tunes.The bus lurched, and Xemnas looked ahead. The bus began to spin madly. Zexion burst into the drivers compartment. "Xemnas, what the hell is going on?!" he asked.

"I don't know, Number VI! The bus just went all haywire!" Xemnas answered, gripping the wheel. Back in the passengers compartment, all was chaos. Axel and Roxas began to panic, and Demyx was having fun, partly because he'd just eaten seven candy bars. Luxord was babbling big words after he and Xaldin had just drank three bottles of rum.

The bus flipped backwards twice, spun 18,000 degrees, and lurched five times, then it calmed down.

They arrived in the hotel late in the afternoon. They got into the hotel, and figured out who was going to stay in the four rooms. Xemnas, Saix, Xigbar, Xaldin, were to stay in one room. Zexion, Axel, Roxas, Demyx, and Marluxia in another. Luxord, Vexen, Lexaeus, and Larxene were to stay in another.

"Absolutely not!" Larxene said sharply."I am not going to sleep in the same room as those buffoons. I will take the couch."

"O.K..." Xemnas said.

Later that night, after dinner to be specific, Axel and Roxas snuck out of their hotel room to play pranks.That was all Axel's idea.

"You sure we're supposed to do this?" Roxas asked nervously.

"There's a lot we shouldn't do. Just follow me," Axel answered, heading down to the lobby. The doorman was asleep, so the pair of them went out into the parking lot.

"What kind of prank are we pulling?" Roxas questioned.

"We're going to keyscratch things on the cars."

Meanwhile, there was a knock on the door of the hotel. Xemnas answered with a scowl. At the door, there was a big man holding Axel and Roxas by their hoods.

"Do these young men bleong to you?" the man asked gruffly.

"Well, if you put it lightly.What did they do?" Xemnas answered.'

"They were keyscratching things on my Corvette," the man shot."I'll leave thier punishment to you."

The man left, and Xemnas scowled at Axel and Roxas."You can join Xaldin and Luxord in the corner for a time out," Xemnas commanded.Axel and Roxas trudged over to the corner, and sat.

"How'd you guys get in trouble?" Roxas asked.

"Luxord kicked my butt in poker, and I lost my temper," Xaldin said.

"We had a cussing war," Luxord added.

The next morning after they ate breakfast, Xemnas drove the group to Magic Kingdom.They went to the check-in atthe front gate, however, Saix's ticket got stuck in the machine, and he went berserko trying to get it out.

"Saix!Leave him!Mr. Ticket is gone!!" Xaldin yelled, holding Saix back by the hood.

"He was a good ticket...his death will not be in vain!Saix go get another ticket from the office," Axel said.

"What?You expect me to forsake Mr. Ticket's sacrifice like that?" Saix demanded."Well, whatever."

By the time Saix bought his ticket, Xemnas and the others were in front of the fake Cinderella castle."Ok, you have five hours to go around the park."

30 minutes later...

"So, Zexion.Any idea where we are?" Demyx asked the shorter.

"No...damn,I think we're lost.Curses it all! Stupid map," Zexion cursed.They were in the middle of nowhere, according to Zexion.

"Wait, I see the castle!" Demyx exclaimed. Zexion folled the hyper Nobody and they found themselves around the Splash Mountain ride.

Meanwhile, Roxas had convinced Axel to ride Splash Mountain, and they were getting into the log car. "Wait, I don't want to do this," Axel stated.

"Too late, we're already on the ride."

"Oh,no," was all Axel said when the ride started. Throughout the ride, Axel was screaming at the most uncalled moments.

Elsewhere, Xaldin and Xigbar werestanding in front of the fake Cinderella castle. "You want to do target pactice?"

"Alright.Get the second floor window," Xaldin said.

Xigbar shot a bullet at the said window. Asthe game continued,Xigbar was owning Xaldin's butt.

12:00 midnight, the Organization's Hotel Room That Never Was...

They all entered, tired as hell.Everyone went to their rooms, and rested for this night. Forthe next night, they'll be going to Animal Kingdom.

* * *

**Whew! This was a long chapter. I know that the end sucked. I got really tired, because I was writing this for 3 hours. I'll try to get the next chappie up as soon as I humanly can.**

**Early Halloween candy for reviewers!!**


	4. Disney World:Part 2

Disney World: Part 2

* * *

This morning was slightly er... slow. Half the Organization was still asleep, and only Xemnas, Vexen, Lexaeus, and Saix had awoken. The weather today was fairly good: clouds dotted the morning sky in dark gray splotches atop a bright blue background, the sun was peeking over the horizon, letting dark orange light shine above the imaginary line where sky and ground met. Xemnas was sitting on the couch, in a calm and composed mood. Vexen sat at the dining table reading newspaper. Lexeaus fiddled with a Rubix cube, and Saix cooked breakfast.

A thunderous slam broke the peaceful silence. Demyx had woken up; hair in a wild mess. When he did so, he had woken up the rest of the Organization.

"Demyx! You freakin' imbecile! Shut doors a little quieter, please!" Zexion shouted, getting out of the room, and attacking Demyx with a pillow.

After breakfast, the Organization went to Animal Kingdom. Xemnas announced to the others as they entered, "You will do well to know that this is the last park that we'll go to. "

Several moans of disappointment erupted from the group, they were expecting to visit all. As they all split to explore the park, Axel, Demyx, Roxas, and Zexion went to the DINOSAUR ride.

"Man, I love dinosaurs," Axel stated. Roxas and Demyx agreed, but Zexion just followed, nose buried in his lexicon.

Once they got on the ride, they all had fun, freaked out, and panicked all throughout the ride.

Meanwhile, Marluxia was bored, so he followed Larxene around, only to be even more damn bored, since all she did was window shop, since her credit card bill was already very large.

" Dammit, Lar-Lar, aren't ya gonna do anything but window shop?" Marluxia asked.

" Listen, Marly, my credit card bill is ready to tip the scale, so I can't buy anything, because the Inferior Superior will get mad at me and give me garbage duty for a month!"

" O.K, point understood."

While those two walked, Xemnas and Saix were being boring, and they circled the park. Several people watched them as they walked around the nearest hot dog stand.

Xigbar and Xaldin were bored as hell, then Xigbar got an idea.

"Hey, let's jump into this fountain!" Xigbar suggested eagerly. Xaldin ignored him and hmph'd. Xigbar pulled his sleeve urging, "Come on!"

"No way, surfer freak! That'd mess up my hair!"

"You mean your monkey dreds?"

"That's it! Bring it, bitch!" Xaldin hollered, and football tackled Xigbar, who shrieked and was knocked down into the fountain.

After two hours of waiting, the Organization lined up at Expedition Everest. The smaller-sized replica of Mt. Everest in the Himalayas excited the younger members, as they climbed into the train-car thing. By the time that the tracks came to an, end, and the ride starts to go backwards, Axel, and Roxas were screaming out random things, and Demyx was crying for Mommy.

After the ride, Xemnas went and bought the picture. Once he saw it, he blushed a dark red at his reaction in the picture. His eyes were wide, his mouth was screaming, his hair was flying upwards, and obscuring the vision of Vexen, who was sitting behind him. Wow, what a long run-on sentence.

At the end of dinner, the Organization made headway for the World That Never Was. The trip was overnight, and they arrived at 12:00 midnight.

**I'm bored of this Disney World idea. Someone help me! I need ideas for the following episodes!!**

**Review! Please.**


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